Quintessence Bonus Content

“Why is everyone always around the house at the moment?”

Sascha frowned at Devon. “What?”

He blinked at her. “Everyone’s always here.” 

“Yes,” she murmured slowly, a little confused as to why he was confused. 

“Why?”

Shaking her head, she muttered, “God give me strength.”

“I don’t think he’s listening, lass, if he were, he’d have made this tit listen to the news more.” Sawyer snorted. “Devon, sweet Jesus, ye cannae have slept through a feckin’ pandemic.”

“I haven’t slept in a few days.” 

Well, that explained why he was blinking owlishly at her, Sascha thought dryly. Two nursing babies made it a lot harder to keep track of him though. Especially when he appeared out of nowhere to take one of the girls from her in the middle of the night, would lay at her side, just holding her, while supporting Sascha and watching the event. 

In fact, they were some of the most beautiful moments of her life, knowing he was propping her up, that she could drift off to sleep with him watching over them, protecting them. 

It just meant that she never knew if he slept or not, and apparently, he wasn’t. 

Damn. 

“Devon, what’s COVID?”

He frowned at Sean. “COVID? A computer game?”

Andrei snickered. “My God, you truly don’t know what we’re talking about, do you?”

For the first time, his scowl darkened, and she saw his rare temper flicker to life. “I wouldn’t have asked, Andrei, if I knew what it was.”

“It’s a virus, Dev,” she said slowly. Not because he was a fool, but because she was hoping to prick his memory. “Surely you’ve heard us talking about it?”

“Not really. Sometimes, you all just talk.” He shrugged. “I don’t process everything.”

“Like we dinnae already feckin’ ken that,” Sawyer said with an eye roll. “I feel like half the shite I spout you dinnae listen to.”

“Well, if you didn’t spout shite, maybe I would.”

Kurt laughed. “You can’t accuse him of that when we’re talking about something important.”

“Why is the computer game important?” 

“Fuck’s sake,” Sawyer muttered. 

“It isn’t a computer game,” Kurt said drolly, then his expression turned somber. “It’s a virus. A bad one. A terrible one. Lots of people have died, Devon.”

His eyes widened. “They have?” His back straightened. “Jacinta? Hamish? Are they okay?”

Sawyer’s temper deflated at that. “Aye, bruv, they’re well. We can speak to them tonight.”

“No, not tonight,” Sascha insisted. “Tonight, Devon is coming to bed. To sleep.”

“Sleeeeeeeep,” Tin chortled, clapping his hands together like he was crashing two cymbals together. “Sleeeeeeeeeep. Sleeeeeeeep.”

Devon’s smile was grim. “I wish I felt that way about it.”

She reached over, squeezed his hand. “We need to switch you off sometimes, Data.”

“My name’s Devon.”

“We need to watch more Next Gen.”

Sean grimaced. “I almost regret showing you that on Netflix.”

She grinned at him cheekily. “You know I love that you look like Riker.”

He snorted. “Compliments… you’re so good with them.”

“Be grateful she doesn’t have us dressing up like prats in tights,” Sawyer muttered, then laughed when she tossed a piece of her croissant at him. 

“For that, I might just get you a costume.”

“Ye can try, lass, but it doesnae mean we’ll wear the fecker.”

Mischief had her shooting an impish grin at him. “We’ll see.”

“If you have me dressing up like something from Star Trek, I’ll get you a costume too.”

She tipped her head to the side. “I might be amenable to that. Which costume?”

“See? This is what I was saying. What are you actually talking about right now?” Devon inserted gruffly, his gaze darting between them all as he tried to compute what they were discussing. 

“Data, Data, Data!” Tin bellowed, loud enough to make them all wince. 

She hushed him by giving him a sippy cup of juice. “Devon, are you all right?”

“Yes, I just have a headache.”

Her brow puckered. “You do?”

He sighed. “Yeah.” Then he rubbed his eyes. 

“Where are your glasses?” 

She cut Sawyer a look. “You think he needs a new prescription?”

“No,” he said with a sniff. “I think he needs to wear the bastards.”

“Bastards, bastards, bastards!” 

“Why does he have to say everything three times?” Sean asked no one in particular, before he sternly stated, “Valentin! That’s a rude word.”

Tin gaped at him. “Is?”

“Yes. Is.” Sean sighed. “Sawyer, you need to watch your mouth.”

“Ye cannae stop me swearing. It’s a part of my national identity.”

Sascha hooted. “That’s a good one.”

He winked. “I’m the best.” Then, apparently sensing Dev’s growing impatience, he muttered, “Where are your glasses, Devon?”

“I think they’re on my desk.”

Sawyer rolled his eyes. “You don’t have a desk.”

“I do.”

“No, you did. Back in Kensington. Now you work in my sitting room. On my coffee table,” she pointed out. Jesus, how out of it was he? 

Ever since Sawyer’s illness, he spaced out more, and even though she’d made him go to the doctor—something he hadn’t appreciated—he was fine. Physically. Sean said he was just prone to episodes, and that the extended almost-fugue state he’d been in while Sawyer was ill was like a muscle memory for his mind. It was easier for him to escape than it had been before.

They were working on it. 

As with everything in her life, it was a work in progress, and while he concerned her, she trusted that Sean knew what he was talking about. 

“Oh yes, I forgot about that.” He narrowed his eyes. “So, how long are we going to be stuck in the house for?”

“You haven’t left the house in, what, seventy days and you’re inquiring now?” Andrei requested, and as was usually the way when he dealt with Devon, he sounded amused. 

She shot him an exasperated look. “Really?”

He just grinned at her. 

“Seventy days? No, it can’t be that long.”

“Trust me, it is,” Sascha said wryly. “It was when we had to drag you out for the christening.”

“I remember that.” He waggled his finger. “I don’t remember any talk of a virus back then.”

“Probably because you weren’t listening,” Kurt retorted. 

“I was listening. I remember the christening, don’t I?”

“What did I wear?”

He tipped his chin at her, his eyes gleaming. “A pantsuit. Tailored.” He hummed. “Your butt looked very nice in it. And you had a hat on that looked like you were wearing birds on your head.”

She grinned. “He remembers!” Then she shot him a wink. “But my hat was beautiful.”

“It looked like a nest.”

“Apparently we just need to tie your wardrobe to every memory he has,” Sean snarked with a shake of his head as he hefted a still pouting Tin onto his knee. When one of the girls started wailing, Tin’s head drifted toward the noise. 

He knew what the twins were, knew they were his family, but still wasn’t entirely sure why they lived with them all the time. 

He coped with the extra babies in the house, mostly because he had more fathers than any one child could handle. 

“That would probably work,” Sascha replied with a grimace. 

Andrei laughed. “Okay, this will be fun. Devon, do you remember that day when Sascha wore that cerise pink dress? It had the tie around her waist, and it knotted at her side?”

Devon narrowed his eyes. “I think I do. If you tugged on the knot, the dress fell down at the front.”

She snorted. “It’s a nursing dress! It’s supposed to have flaps.”

Andrei waved a hand at her. “Well, do you remember the last time she wore it?”

Devon hummed, then clicked his fingers. “We sent the guards home.”

“That’s right. We sent the guards home because we knew we’d be in lockdown for a long time.”

“That was when this COVID thing started?” Devon whistled. “That’s a long time ago.”

“Trust me, we know,” Kurt replied with a laugh. 

“How long ago?”

“Sixty-seven days ago.” 

Andrei snickered. “We’re counting.” 

“Wow, we only just sneaked the christening in on time, didn’t we?”

Sascha laughed. “Yes, the babies have perfect timing.”

He drummed his fingers against the table. “Well, haven’t they fixed it yet?”

“You can’t fix a virus.”

“Surely there’s a way.”

“I wish you were a doctor, Dev, because I have no doubt you wouldn’t sleep until you figured out a solution,” she said dryly. 

“It’s never too late to become one,” he pointed out, rubbing his chin. 

“You’d make a shite doctor, Devon. You’d only want to treat the interesting cases, and ye have the bedside manner of a robot.” 

“That’s not fair,” he grumbled, actually looking offended. 

Chuckling, Kurt asked, “Do you even want to be a doctor?”

“No.” He shrugged. “But maybe I can fix things.”

She hid a smile. “Not this, but people are trying. We’ve all just got to do our bit and stay in where we can.”

“I stay in all the time,” he pointed out. 

“You were doing your bit before the virus struck,” Sean replied with a grin, and he laughed when Devon’s chest puffed out. 

“I was, wasn’t I?”

“Yeah, Dev, you were.” Her eyes twinkled as she reached for his hand and squeezed his fingers. “We’re getting through this—together.”

“Well, not together considering he didn’t even know what we were getting through,” Andrei grunted. 

She crinkled her nose at him. “You know what I mean.”

Devon, using his grip on her hand, tugged her around, then looked at her, his gaze scanning over her in a way that had her arching a brow at him. 

“What’s wrong?”

“I’m remembering what you’re wearing so I don’t forget we had this conversation.”

She huffed. “This is going to give me a complex. I either wear memorable clothing or Devon forgets everything important.”

“Not everything. Just the bits that don’t fit in with his research,” Andrei pointed out with a smirk, as he picked up his toast and took a large bite from it. 

Sascha would have liked to argue, but yeah, that wasn’t going to happen. 

Instead, she decided to own it. 

Getting to her feet, she did a full on twirl, and said, “There. You’ve seen what I’m wearing.”

“I’d probably remember it more if you showed me your bra and knickers.”

She grinned at him as she plunked herself back in her chair. “I’ll just bet you would.”

“Can’t blame a man for trying,” Sawyer remarked sagely, nodding his head at Devon, evidently in full agreement. 

“Maybe you should just eat breakfast with no clothes on, Sascha,” Andrei chimed in. “None of us would ever dare go senile if it meant we got to see a flash of your tits for breakfast.”

Though she flipped him the bird, she ducked her chin to hide her amusement. 

Men. 

Couldn’t live with them, couldn’t live without them. 

Copyright Serena Akeroyd 2020

Devon: God, it feels like a lifetime since I’ve done this 

Sawyer: Done what? 

Devon: Texted you 

Sawyer: What the hell are ye talking about? I talked to ye ten seconds ago 

Devon: Ah, but I didn’t text you 

Devon: I yelled at you from across the room 

Sawyer: Ye did

Sawyer: I’m still in the same room

Sawyer: So, why aren’t ye yelling at me now?

Devon: Dunno. 

Devon: Thought I’d text you 

Sawyer: The question is why am I texting yer back?

Sascha: Dinner’s ready 

Sawyer: Yer over the other side of the room! 

Sascha: Saw Devon texting you lol

Sascha: Thought I’d join in

Sawyer: God help me 

Sean: Why are we using this text thread again? 

Kurt: I hate texting 

Sascha: I like it 

Sascha: You don’t text the kids enough

Kurt: I email them 

Sascha: That’s not what they want though, is it? 

Devon: I text them every day 

Sascha: Yes, I know. Jack told me yesterday you wouldn’t stop texting him until he replied 

Devon: Well, what’s the point of instant messaging if it isn’t instant? 

Andrei: Jesus, what if he was on the toilet? 

Devon: All the more reason to be instant 

Sascha: By the sounds of it, he was busy in the bedroom 

Devon: Lazy boy. Always sleeping 

Sean: Hardly! He’s always training is what he is 

Devon: Not at this time of the year. He’s in bed. He can text me back. 

Sascha: I didn’t mean he was taking a nap, Devon! 

Andrei: He takes after you, Devon lol 

Devon: Well, I didn’t like to say anything but… 

Sawyer: I think he’s more like Kurt 

Sawyer: Kurt can barely do algebra either

Andrei: That’s not fair. He’s the writer lol. We’re the math brains 

Devon: I taught Jack algebra 

Sascha: No, you taught him university-grade higher math, Devon. 

Sascha: He came to me and asked if he really needed it for year 6! 

Sascha: That was the day I took over their homework with Sean’s help 

Devon: Huh. I wondered why he stopped asking me questions

Sascha: Years too late now. Why didn’t you ask nearer the time? 

Devon: I’ve never pushed our children to do anything, Sascha 

Sean: He has a point, love. I think he’d be okay if they were all beach bums

Devon: Gah, we have enough money to look after their great-grandchildren and life is VERY short 

Kurt: Thankfully, they’re upstanding members of society 

Sascha: Unlike us lol 

Sean: I like our position in society. Means people leave us alone. 

Sean: Don’t suppose you’ve failed to notice how busy our social life has become since Tin moved to Veronia? 

Sascha: No. I don’t like it either 

Kurt: At least it’s his fault this time 

Sascha: Yes, I’m still annoyed about that Oscar 

Sascha: I mean, darling, I’m beyond proud of you. I always am, you know that. But God, I missed your grandfather, Andrei, when that reporter wouldn’t leave me alone after the ceremony 

Andrei: Yes, having an in with the Bratva did come in useful sometimes lol 

Andrei: You never said

Sascha: About what?

Devon: The reporter

Sascha: I did

Sascha: Several times a day 

Sascha: Until Sean put the cops on them 

Sascha: *sniffs* He’s the only one I can rely on to LISTEN 

Sean: It did take a few weeks of ‘listening,’ darling. Sorry about that <3

Sawyer: Feckin’ suck up

Sean: Shove it 

Sawyer: Why are we still texting? We’re literally all in the kitchen 

Devon: It isn’t the kitchen. It’s my office 

Sawyer: Your office is wherever Sascha is lol 

Sascha: Yes, he’s like my little stalker, aren’t you, darling? 

Devon: I wouldn’t classify myself as little, Sascha 

Sascha: You’re okay with being my stalker though, hmm?

Devon: I’d prefer shadow 

Sean: Because that isn’t more intrusive 

Andrei: I found him in the laundry room yesterday 

Sawyer: In the dark 

Sascha: Yes, I must check on you when I switch between rooms. 

Andrei: You failed as a shadow yesterday, Devon

Devon: What can I say? I was pondering 

Sawyer: Looked like you were taking a nap to me (like father, like son)

Devon: I was resting my eyes 

Kurt: Isn’t that the same thing?

Devon: No! I was PONDERING

Devon: Do you even know what that means? 

Kurt: I think I have a good handle on the English language, Devon 

Devon: You’ve gotten ever so smug since that gold award, Kurt 

Sascha: Well, it was a big deal. 

Devon: Yes, but the smugness about speaking English as a second language is entirely unnecessary. I’ve always thought he speaks better English than Andrei 

Andrei: Since when was I the measure?

Sascha: Andrei speaks English perfectly 

Devon: Yes, but he didn’t get a man award, did he?

Andrei: No, just a Nobel Prize. 

Kurt: Is dinner actually ready? We can discuss this verbally 

Devon: No, I don’t want dinner tonight

Sascha: Why not? 

Devon: I saw what you put in it 

Sascha: Charming! 

Sawyer: I’ll have his portion. I saw it too. Looks feckin’ delicious 

Sascha: What’s wrong with it, Devon? It’s only pasta

Devon: You put anchovies in 

Sawyer: Makes it authentic 

Devon: How is it authentic to put fish in a beef dish?

Sascha: I followed a recipe! 

Sascha: It took me five hours to make this, Devon. You’re going to try it

Devon: What do I get if I do? 

Sascha: I refuse to bargain with you 

Sascha: This isn’t a negotiation

Devon: I think it should be 

Andrei: What did you want to negotiate over? 

Devon: Her Christmas gift 

Sascha: Oh. 

Devon: You said we’d talk about it later

Sascha: And this is later? 

Devon: Yes 

Devon: Well, it’s actually the 31st. So it’s a lot later. I keep waiting for you to bring it up, Sascha, but you never do 

Sascha: The children have been home! 

Sascha: I also didn’t expect you to give me a strap-on for Christmas, Devon! 

Andrei: I don’t know, I thought it was a fabulous gift. Jack saw it too. I thought he was going to have a heart attack 

Sascha: And you wanted that, did you? Our baby boy? Croaking years early because he thinks his mother is going to fuck one of his fathers?

Devon: Hey! Not one of. Me. I bought it for you! 

Sascha: Devon, you know what I mean 

Devon: No, I didn’t actually. 

Sascha: You’re being purposely pedantic 

Sawyer: Isn’t he always? 

Sean: You might not want dinner, Devon, but I do. So, can we get on with this conversation?

Sean: Sascha, are you against using a strap-on on Devon? 

Sawyer: You could use it on me too if yer want. They say anal orgasms are the best

Kurt: Says the man who doesn’t like anyone’s junk near his 

Sean: Indeed. You make no sense, Sawyer 

Sawyer: Who said I had ter? 

Devon: You can get one of your own for her! I’m not sharing

Sascha: I can’t believe we’re actually talking about this 

Kurt: Liebchen, what’s wrong? You know you can talk about anything with us 

Andrei: You just want to watch lol 

Kurt: I wouldn’t say no haha

Sean: Sweetheart? 

*two minutes later*

Sascha: If you eat your dinner, Devon, every bite, I’ll do it tonight 

Devon: Can I have the non-fish version?

Sascha: What are you? Five?! No, you can’t. How am I supposed to take the fish out when I put it in five hours ago? 

Sascha: Anyway, the negotiation is over. You eat. I fuck you. How about that? 

Sean: Are you sure you want to, love? You really had to think about it 

Sascha: It’s dumb

Sean: What is? 

Andrei: Nothing is ever dumb where you’re concerned, milaya 

Sascha: I’m not sure I’ll look good wearing it and I’m embarrassed 

Devon: You’ll look like a goddess

Devon: With a dick 

Sascha: *snorts*

Devon: I specifically got those straps and the color so it would suit you 

Sascha: I never thought you’d be into this, Devon. 

Devon: Try anything once, Sascha.

Sascha: SO TRY THE DAMN FISH RAGU

Devon: I’m negotiating, Sascha!

Sawyer: Why now?

Devon: Why not now? 

Devon: Also, Rosie was on the family computer and left up a web page 

Sawyer: Things I didn’t need to ken about my wee girlie

Sean: I didn’t need to know that either 

Kurt: Grow up 

Sascha: Exactly!

Devon: Hey! Why did he get a kiss and not me? I didn’t judge! In fact, I gave her a gift card to that site for Christmas!

Sascha: Fine 

Devon: That’s better. 

Devon: I got two so there, Kurt.

Sascha: It’s like herding cats!  

Sawyer: What’s this web page, then? Apparently I need to buy my own. I dinnae mind sharing, Devon

Devon: I’ll send you the link  

Devon: Because I do 

Sawyer: Can’t you just put it in the dishwasher?

Devon: No. You can’t. Your anal juice and my anal juice will never cross paths 

Sawyer: And you claim to be an eco warrior

Devon: Some things are just sacred

Devon: But you have to get Sascha one that suits her. 

Sawyer: Of course. What dae yer take me fer?

Devon: I did buy you something else, Sascha. If you’re uncomfortable with it. 

Sawyer: How many gifts did you get her?! 

Devon: Well, one. The strap on was for me mostly lol 

Sascha: Oh, Devon! It’s beautiful. I love it so much! 

Sawyer: Aye, gotta admit, lad, that’s pretty as hell 

Sean: I can’t wait to see you in it, darling 

Andrei: Me too, milaya 

Kurt: You’ll look like an angel in that lingerie, Liebchen

Devon: No! She won’t. She’ll look like my goddess! 

Sawyer: Aawwwww, she’s all flustered now 

Sascha: Enough talk of strap ons, goddesses, and anal juice. It’s time for dinner! Put your phones down before I put THEM in the dishwasher 

Sean: That worked out well for you, didn’t it, Devon?

Devon: 😇